Crime

The police blotter for the North metro contains less meth than I expected, but just as much WTFness. Here are the funnier ones:

Blaine: “A man called police to his home in the 11200 block of Terrace Road NE. because he said his neighbor continually blows his snow into his yard and onto his privacy fence. Police spoke with the neighbor, who the report said declined to change his behavior and requested a ticket. The police issued a citation for littering.”

Coon Rapids: “Someone called police to report hearing seven gunshots fired in a hallway in the 1800 block of 105th Lane NW. Police set up a perimeter and entered the building. Officers found broken balloons in an entryway and believed that to be the cause of the sound heard by the caller.”

Fridley: “Police responded to a report of a smell of natural gas coming from an apartment in the 1100 block of 52nd Avenue NE. Police did not detect the odor of natural gas, but did detect the smell of dead fish. An officer advised the fire department of the findings.”

Mounds View: “Police responded to a call of a vehicle in the ditch in the 2600 block of County Road I. A 22-year-old Mounds View man was arrested for third-degree driving while intoxicated.”

Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work! (via)

1. Don’t put drugs in people’s drinks in order to control their behavior.
2. When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them alone!
3. If you pull over to help someone with car problems, remember not to assault  them!
4. NEVER open an unlocked door or window uninvited.
5. If you are in an elevator and someone else gets in, DON’T ASSAULT THEM!
6. Remember, people go to laundry to do their laundry, do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.
7. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people, ask a friend to stay with you while you are in public.
8. Always be honest with people! Don’t pretend to be a caring friend in order to gain the trust of someone you want to assault. Consider telling them you plan to assault them. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the other person may take that as a sign that you do not plan to rape them.
9. Don’t forget: you can’t have sex with someone unless they are awake!
10. Carry a whistle! If you are worried you might assault someone “on accident” you can hand it to the person you are with, so they can blow it if you do.

And, ALWAYS REMEMBER: if you didn’t ask permission and then respect the answer the first time, you are commiting a crime- no matter how “into it” others appear to be.